Posts Tagged ‘#peoplealwaysleave’

Goodbyes are forever?

Posted: April 11, 2018 in Heartache
Tags: ,

A caption from you,

A glimpse of your existence,

A virtual reality of my missing link,

Just a drop in the universe of bits,

It takes me back to that last time,

Weakens all I had built so far.

Reminds me of how,

I loved.

I lived.

I fought.

For love.

For love leads me back to you.

And I’m sorry…

But I didn’t know it ended?!

I’m still hoping Like love in the time of cholera,

You will still look for me when you’re old and frail,

Just to feel before we die apart what it felt like to be infinitely understood.


I still imagine myself ,

Standing On your doorway,

Surprising you from  across the globe.

You’re afraid,

Than happy.

What will she think

You ask.

I crossed continents for you,

Just to try one more time,

If love still had value.

You say,

You have made a home,

Out of nowhere,

Ask me to stay for tea,

Say she would love to see me.

I see you’re beguiled,

About humans and homes, 

They never find each other,

They are never the True North,

Without a heart-

To keep them warm. 

You are the boy who made all the other boys nothings. You are the man that I silently look for approvals in empty streets full of people that don’t know me. You are my excuse for the weight gain bordering obesity. You are the ‘what if’ that I want to silence but even the days smell of you and colors blend to make your face in smokes of cigarettes. Your crooked veins are what I look for in a man for yours were the roots that anchored my raison d’être. It’s heartbreaking to know that I have to say the only man I love shall be triumphantly “over with” or “ let go” as if life after that begins when truly it ends. So memories is what I crave for hoping one day in another parallel universe you still smell like forever🐼

I just read somewhere that rain is good for the soul. That winter is cold for a reason. That those who stay  when you have nothing familiar but a sweat drenched T-shirt to keep you warm are the ones who stayed. And as for you, you are the one that ran away with the first sign of a snow. I hope your bed is warm. I hope you can still sleep with yourself. Because I can’t and I am the One who stayed💔💔

Always leaving…

Posted: March 17, 2017 in Heartache

This was the moment . Only you and GOD. There was no one to tell you to stop crying, to calm your nerves down or to just be there to listen. You had no one in that hour of you standing in the corridors of some office you wish you could just fleet from. 

It was never a fact that you needed someone…you didn’t need anyone. You wanted them to want to be there. You wanted them to fight for you like you always fought for them too. But you should have known better; all the fight you ever sought ended before it began and you weren’t even the trophy at the end of the tunnel. An accident at best but never a choice.

So everyday you learn that when people leave they really do leave and they always take something with them and you are never the same but they dare ask you why you have changed. But it’s these seamingly unimportant moments of complete breakdown that make you wrap yourself up in a bundle like you used to and be belittled for being too aloof or emotional. If only they knew they took a portion of your life you will never get back and that right now you waking up everyday questioning why is a battle they won’t ever understand. 

The best thing to do right now is to close your eyes and stop asking why they always leave? Why the ones you love pretend to be there when they really aren’t ??? What is this about you that scares those you love away?? 

You left. No denying it was a choice. You can’t say I’m here and not be present when all she needs is you. Do you comprehend the loss she feels for the unmade phone calls and the words you never fathomed to say when you could of. You have never been bare naked emotionally to understand the inevitability of goodbyes with every moment she was made to feel like a second choice for people you don’t remember their names today. You left. You left and then you leave you always leave. Maybe I should let you be…

The color of life,
Is with each breath he takes.
The pulsations of the morning sun,
The cool of the afternoon heat,
The tranquility of the commotion,
The port of my desolation,
The rain after the clouds,
The lines that reveal my years,
The rebirth of being me.
He is my colors of colors,
In him I find-
All the words I cannot say,
In the life I wanted him to stay.