Anyone out there?

Posted: January 5, 2013 in Uncategorized

The first christmas away from home and this wont be an easy one. I am already feeling so low with the crumbling of things before my eyes and losing a grip in everything that once seemed permanent.
I am not a person who gets psyched about any holiday a week before and prepare for the eve at the same time! Infact Holidays crash my mood a lot of times but since the past few years I have learned to tolerate these days because of the people that came with it. My friend’s and my “boyfrirnd’s” birthdays are on christmas! So I get excited about the presents if not the day itself. My friend, Selam, is definately gonna have a bad birthday for she.doesnt like her birthday and it was us (my friend nardi &I) that made her day worthwhile. And I being the craziest of my friends, I am expected to make her happy and I almost always do!i aint bragging for real!
And with my relationship with my man going down in an unpredictable road, being with him would have helped because birthdays in most cases bring the happy in people under normal circumstances. And this christmas would have brought the jolly in the stale dynamics of our relationship.but even when I write those lines my heart is telling me to know better and stop wishing for him to care like he once did….but he won’t aydel?
I have tried to switch off my cell phone but I don’t want to sound like I hate happiness when it doesnt include me…happiness is real only when its shared…so I am stuck here picking up phone calls from elated people, reciprocating a fake smile for no one can see how fake it is!
My wish for the coming few days is to tolerate christmas& I am praying the two people I love end up with a smile on their faces and my abscence doesn’t end up making them sad.
So anyone out there feeling like I do, can send me a hug…at least!
Merry christmas lonely people!

  1. Kalkidan Girma says:

    anchi do you fake smile me when i call u ende??? i’ll kill u for zat…i need to know when the world aint right witchu woman!

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